Friday, June 21, 2013

Having Mountain Moving Faith

Thankfully I have been feeling much better as of late. My physical and pool therapies have helped me immensely as well as the medication I have been taking. Lately, I have been attempting to meditate a lot more and listen to positive lectures on health and power of your mind. I recently listened to a lecture by Joel Osteen that really changed my way of thinking.

I have always been a resigned individual...to a fault. I have a strong belief system in God and things happening the way they are meant to so my tendency has always been not to fight difficulties, but accept them. My mother and plenty of other close friends and family have been telling me to focus on positive thinking and trying to condition myself to see CMT not affecting me the way it does but for some reason, that never clicked 100% with me...For some reason, watching this lecture, I finally snapped and got what everyone has been talking about for ages.

In this lecture, Joel Osteen talks about Having Mountain Moving Faith and talking to your mountain, that big permanent problem that doesn't seem to be going anywhere anytime soon. Well, as you can imagine, my mountain is CMT. And I've been talking to her...call me crazy!

But wouldn't you know, that since I've been talking to my mountain, things just seem to be falling into place? I am having a lot more energy, I am managing to get a lot more accomplished around the house, I am getting up in the morning with very little pain and ready to go, even when I've had a jam-packed day the day before.

And what do I say to my mountain? I listen to a lot of what he says in the lecture and I tell CMT that I am commanding it to leave, that my God is bigger and stronger than CMT will ever be in my body, that we've had a good run together but I have learned the lessons that it came to teach me. I also tell CMT that it's time for us to part ways so I can move on to the next phase of my life: parenthood. That I want to have a pregnancy with less medications, I want to be big and beautiful and want my legs to be strong enough to hold me...and I just talk. If you know me, you know I am a yapper! And talking to it and telling it we are done seems to have changed something in me physically, emotionally and spiritually. I am not allowing it to take over me. I have stopped saying: "Man, I know I am going to be exhausted tomorrow because I've done so much today"...instead I am saying "Tomorrow is going to be another wonderful day and I'm going to wake up full of energy and ready to go."

It took me a long time to get here but it seems I finally learned. I am going to continue to talk to my mountains going forward because I like this new me...I like being able to be more independent and self-reliant and it makes me feel like the old me...before I ever heard of the words: Charcot-Marie-Tooth.

And all of this has brought on a new excitement, a desire to do more...which I will share in my next post!